What is Shadowplay?

In Part 2 of Yamini's story, we are presented with a rogue's game called Shadowplay. Inspired by ideas of the Battle Room from Ender's Game and Drizzt's melee tournaments in Homeland, Shadowplay is a quarterly guild event wherein combatants enter a large arena with sparring weapons. The arena is sealed and all lights are turned off, creating an area of complete darkness. Combatants must navigate the arena floor, which consists of several pillars, obstacles and fall-throughs, whilst avoiding--or dispatching--other rogues. Dispatching another rogue requires striking a vital area with the sparring weapon of choice, resulting in a temporary stun state until the end of the match. Wound points are taken into account during the final round for placing purposes, but whomever is left standing is named the ultimate victor regardless of point accumulation.

The philosophy behind Shadowplay, in Soliessen's eyes, is to train the students to rely on instincts as well as other senses besides sight. For years, rogues train to manipulate their surroundings and use cover of darkness as their primary advantage. By turning that advantage against them, essentially leveling the playing field between combatants, Shadowplay forces the students to become even more creative, adaptive and resourceful. It also forces them to become more conniving. Alliances and betrayals saturate the playing field. As Soliessen has stated, the only trustworthy rogue is oneself.

Fortunately for Yamini, sometimes the best partner is a specter from another plane...

Elementals' Spells and Abilities list

So this list is...wow, almost a year old. But I thought it would be pertinent to repost it here.

http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=293159501&blogId=450886573

A complete but ongoing list of the six main elementals and their respective abilities from Of Avatars. Of course, the same abilities will be apparent in future novels as well (we follow Yamini as she learns most of her tricks in Of Shadow), and there's a good chance that additional abilities will be added in the future as they are discovered. Happy reading, gamers and readers.

At the behest of my fans...

Okay. I should say fan. Singular.

I realize it has been some time since I've updated. This is due partly to life having gotten a bit busy recently, and partly due to there being very little to report. Work on Of Shadow has slowed considerably. Continuity issues. Fears and uncertainties. Nothing out of the usual for me. First drafts aren't easy, and they aren't quick. Couple those things with one of the world's most adept procrastinators and you'll have quite a wait for a piece of literature.

Thankfully, you can be assured that it ends up pretty good. =)

With weekends being the only time I can sit down and focus, and these past several weekends being loaded with weddings and festivals and everything else keeping me away from the keyboard, I've gotten a bit lazy. Sorry to report, I still haven't applied my edits to Of Avatars. That goes without saying, no query letters have been crafted, no agents or agencies submitted to--basically, no progress other than that of the new book. Maybe this is good enough, maybe it isn't. For me, it signifies failure and inadequate motivation.

I'm torn between perfecting my first piece and finishing the second. For being this late in the game, that's kind of bad. Especially since I have to literally wait for Yamini to finish telling the story. I don't know everything that is going to happen, and neither does she. I know where she ends up...just not how she gets there exactly. That is the fun part about writing these stories. It is as much an adventure for me as it is for the characters. They never fail to surprise, never disappoint.

I, on the other hand...

*sighs* Back to work.

Young Assassin's Poem

So I was feeling in a poetic mood again last week and this is what came out of me. My mind has been deep into creating book two and familiarizing myself with the characters. This poem is written from Yamini's perspective after she is given her first journal and expresses her apprehension for following Soliessen's leadership in the rogue's guild. In order to comply with her assignments, she learns to dissociate from herself and forms a vicious, cold alter-ego. Yamini has yet to name the piece.

A tangled web we weave indeed

From blades of steel so crass,

Withdrawn in part a once warm heart

To my dismay, alas.

We fight for those without a cause

And those who lack the skill,

But darkness hides behind those eyes;

She does it for the thrill.

I must get free from their decree,

From hatred and despair...

Find haven safe within this state,

I fear I know not where.

For there must be another way

To circumvent the lie,

To rescue those who'd flee in droves.

How can they? How can I?

"I am Not Reckless"

To celebrate my motivated progress with OSaD I thought I'd share an excerpt of a future chapter with you, dear reader. I thought this bit would be suitable for showing off the main character, Yamini, in her natural setting (and spunk!) three years after her story begins. For a fourteen-year-old, I'd say she's a pretty cool kid! Then again, I am biased...

"Wait, what are you doing?" Henrik asked, his face contorted with concern.

"Is it not obvious?" said Yamini. "I am going after him myself."

The two boys looked at each other and laughed. Then they realized she was serious. "You can't do that!" said Sebastian.

Yamini cocked an eyebrow. "Can is a matter of ability and ambition," she replied, "and I most certainly have both!"

Henrik watched with disbelief as Yamini unsheathed both daggers and concealed each blade behind her inner forearms. "It's bold enough that you've attempted to steal Master Soliessen's recruits--"

"She is no longer our master," Yamini spat, "and by being here you have proven my attempt successful."

"Breaking away from a former guild to forge your own is one thing," Sebastian argued, "but claiming Soliessen's marks is suicide, Yamini!" She ignored him as she stood and crept into the shadowed archway of the arena staircase. "There are codes to adhere to, principles to follow. You are nothing but a rogue, a brash vigilante with a taste for vengeance. Why should we follow you? Your impulsiveness would mean our deaths!"

Yamini glared at the boy. "I am not a vigilante," she breathed. "Vigilantes thrive on chaos. They are mindless seekers of blood and terror, aimless wanderers hoping to vent their discontent with the world on those who appear at first to have caused it. These individuals have become lost in their own corruption, their own greed, resorting to violence disguised as justice while they seek the definition of themselves. They do so recklessly and without planning. I am an assassin."

"And what's the difference between them and you?" said Henrik.

Her wicked smile was enough to make both boys step backward. "I am not reckless."

zOMG busy!

I've been so preoccupied going over edits and restarting Yamini's story that I didn't realize how long it has been since I've posted! My agent list is just about compiled, but after going over the manuscript with Sam I realize I still have quite a bit of revising to do, and that the query-perfecting and agent-spamming is still a little ways off. Nevertheless, I refuse to be discouraged. I've gotten this far, and I find myself still more than motivated to carry on.

Yamini's story, Of Shadow and Dissonance, is coming along nicely. With the confidence of having one novel under my belt already, I am sure that this next book won't take near as long to complete. Rather than give myself a nine-year deadline, I will aim to be done with the first draft come Christmas. Hey, it's a realistic goal, and that's a fairly trying goal for someone like me! *blushes* If I can manage to stay focused like I was with the last chapter of OAaE, I should be able to meet it...or possibly finish ahead of schedule! The revising should be a bit easier this go around also. Especially since I won't be trying to polish year-old writing, and I've learned a lot from going over edits this past week and a half.

That said, here's to editing. And to Yamini!

Anxiety and Reader Finish Lines

I am pleased that a few of my readers have already finished their first read throughs! (And I say first only because they've mentioned going through it again, not as an assumtion. That'd be silly!) I have yet to sit down and discuss the story at length with any of them, but I am hoping to get a few critiques and Q&A starting with the end of this week. Even if it takes me bribing people out of the house with coffee, I will siphon their thoughts one way or another! Ahem. Anyway, I am still every bit as excited about the progress everyone else is making. People stop in and say that they've been reading my book, even if they aren't close to halfway finished, and it makes me smile to know that my words are being read--and enjoyed. It's like...that first house party. You know there's a potential for mess...but you revel in the fact that others are sharing your space, your world, with you. This story is like, my universe, my escape from reality, and it finally is housing other live people exploring its mysteries and characters. My readers are, in effect, making my parallel world more alive to me. For that, I can not express enough gratitude and joy.

At the same time, I am still heavily researching the industry and agents...a task that is taking longer than I anticipated. I figure, if I'm going to put the time and effort into this, I might as well make sure I do it correctly from the beginning. The first book I bought on agents (I have my eye on two others) has quite a few useful articles about the industry in the beginning. I haven't even reached the listings pages yet. Nevertheless, I feel like I'm learning a lot all over again. What to do. What not to do. How to do both. Learning fills me with confidence, so naturally the more, the better. Just have to keep moving forward so I can progress to the query writing. And the rejection letters! <3

Or hopefully...an acceptance letter.

Full Novel on Scribd

I've decided to make the entire manuscript available to read online @ http://www.scribd.com/doc/16868862/Of-Avatars-and-Elementals. I have, however, disabled the download option, as everyone in my circle has already been notified and sent a copy of the PDF and I don't want copies of the file to spread TOO far to people I don't know. (Call me paranoid or protective, I don't mind.) Anyhow, I figured having the story accessible online would make it easier for friends and acquaintances to get others interested in the story, and if they deem it a worthy read they can come to me directly.

Naturally, it will not be left up forever. I've set a tentative expiration date of one month, though that may be extended (or shortened!) depending on the responses I receive from queried agents (really need to get the ball rolling on that). Something tells me they wouldn't be crazy about the idea of a novel they're aiming to represent being available for widespread download!

In the meantime, I am researching (for the third or fourth time) the industry, mechanics, protocol and etiquette for agents, editors and publishers. There's so much to learn and take in. And perfect. My query letter (and possibly synopsis, I've learned) will have to be just as polished and intriguing as the novel itself if I'm ever to gain anyone's attention. Or representation. At this point, I'd like to think I possess the skill level to do these things with a bit of practice. All that is left is hoping that the market is open to what I've written, and that an agent will believe in it as much as I do.

Two Heads (or ten...or twenty...)

Definitely better than one.

As readers make their way through OAaE, I begin to realize the advantage of having so many eyes on the text aside from the feedback I receive. I've been buried so deep in this manuscript for so long that even the faintest mistakes elude me. It's almost as if I'm immune to typos, no matter how many times I go over the piece, because my mind knows how it is supposed to read and so my eyes skip over errors as easily as they overlook imperfections in the mirror. Thankfully I have enough people streaming me corrections to be made, both large and small, which I will "patch" in once more people have reached the end of the novel.

New Respect for Publicists!

Well, after an additional week of fine tuning, I've released Of Avatars and Elementals to quite a few of my contacts. I think that my spirits, patience and hope are not completely out of order, for while I sent notice to around one hundred people and have had correspondence with perhaps a dozen, I am not discouraged in the least. Quite the contrary, I'm overly excited about the few who have taken a sincere interest both in reading and in helping me to find more of an audience. I suppose one could say that the difficult part is now over. The story is in the hands of readers. I am in the process of agent research. Now all I really have to do is sit and wait patiently for feedback...and resume work on Yamini's story, Of Shadow and Dissonance.

Attempt 1 status: failed?

Okay...so I never have been an expert at deadlines. My own, apparently, are no exception. But thankfully I don't consider it a complete failure. Not in the way that most of my "deadlines" have been utter busts over the years. This time, at the very least, I can say that I sat and grinded on my manuscript ALL. WEEKEND. LONG. From wake to crash I read, typed, retyped, read aloud until my eyes burned. And you know something? It felt good. It felt good to be motivated again.

For years this project has been with me, in the back of my mind and heart, waiting to show itself to the world. The characters screamed at me to finish their stories, to give them closure, and being their god I denied them...because I knew their futures. It didn't matter if the rest of the world knew. No one else appeared to give a damn anyway.

Now, even though I've sent word to close to fifty people and received maybe ten responses, I know that at least a few people are interested in taking a peek at the world I've created. As a god of my own little fictitious universe, this pleases me. I managed to hammer out a complete rewrite of the first chapter, sixteen pages, in two days. Might not sound like much, but coming from me, that is a lot. Especially considering that the second half of the book's final chapter, fifteen pages, took close to three months to finish.

What have I learned from this weekend? That I AM capable of being infused with motivation, after years spent dabbling and struggling to get a few lines down over the course of weeks. That there ARE people waiting for me to tie the pretty little bow around my life's work (yes, I consider 10 of 24 years my life's work). That I CAN outdo myself from time to time when I throw aside the limitations and work from freeflowing creativity. And that even though I may miss a deadline or two and disappoint a few friends, family and fans along the way, the end result can and WILL justify the delay. After a decade's worth of creating, fleshing out, designing, writing, dreaming, breathing, and ignoring my little fantasy world, I owe it to you, dear reader, to give you the best I have to offer.

Back to work. =)

The Summary Hitherto

So I figured I'd post the "dust jacket" plot summary, since I was silly enough not to include it anywhere online yet. (Silly writer. How are you supposed to accumulate readers?) Of course, the wording of the final synopsis will be up to the publisher and whatever copyrighter they decide to use. Until that dream becomes a reality, this will simply have to do. Bon appetit!

Handwriting has been outlawed. Nomads are not permitted to leave the city. Citizens walk the streets in fear, if at all. And the gate guards, once sworn to protect, strike fear into the hearts of passersby. When inmate Xearo Ta'Lorence becomes the first to escape the city of Rhevise, he and childhood friend Aeria aim to get as far from the province as possible. But when the fugitives discover that a raging covert war threatens to extinguish mankind, they realize their freedom has a steep price.

Exiled with limited resources, they must assemble their own team and pick up where the Rhevisean military left off. Only the enemy seems invulnerable to every traditional method of attack. Soon they realize humanity's last hope lies in Avatar, a mysterious wandering forest hermit with unusual druidic powers. From him they can learn to utilize mana, a once-abundant substance capable of channeling powerful magic. The only problem is that Avatar is not convinced humanity deserves to be saved at all.

Deadlines...this is new...

Even though this is the first official deadline I've set for myself (and any time I say "official" that just means I've said it to enough people to make my life hell if I don't follow through), it's still a daunting task to put a time cap on something. Perhaps the reason I did it is for practice, because I know that eventually...deadlines are going to be something I must perfect. Until now I've been very wishy-washy, saying things like, "Oh, I'll be done by the end of 2008," and then taking an additional six months to do just that. I can't count the times I've told myself and maybe a handful of others that I'd be done that weekend, that month, that year. Ugh.

Another reason, perhaps, is to keep myself motivated. Am I tricking my own mind? Possibly. But if it works, I can't really argue. The idea of having fifty people expecting something from me on a specific day and then not delivering churns my stomach. I couldn't handle disappointing that many people. And so here I am, glued to the couch for the second day in a row writing and rewriting.

To this day it amazes me how many transformations take place in a story over time. I think back to the original draft of Intrepid Earth that I wrote in high school and realize what absolute garbage the prose is to me, and at the time I was thinking, "Man! My writing can't get much better than this!" Boy, was I wrong. Now, writing the first chapter from scratch for the fourth time, I'm coming to understand something that I'm sure all published and successful authors struggle with: No piece is ever finished. It just reaches an acceptable point to give it to the world. I think forward to when my novel will be sitting on the shelves (nothing wrong with wishful thinking) and...sort of dread knowing that it will be final, that even if I go home and draft another version ten times better from scratch, that's it. It's on the shelves. Done.

*sighs* Best to make sure that the published version is kick ass to begin with, and then put it out of mind.

In the Beginning...

As of three days ago I've officially finished writing the meat and core of my novel, Of Avatars and Elementals, book 1 of my Intrepid Earth series. At this point I feel remarkably accomplished, and still there is so much left to figure out. So many places to go from here...so many things to do beforehand. Let me see if I can't flesh out a list of sorts, albeit out of order!

• I need to get ahold of Jami. She's the reason I bothered rewriting the story to begin with. I owe her a great deal of thanks for motivating me to draft a second version of the previously unfinished manuscript.
• I need to make a serious list of Sci-Fi/Fantasy literary agents. This will likely involve a bit of time at the book store and online.
• Draft query letters. Several of them. Then send out personalized queries to the above-specified agents in small waves until the list is depleted. Hopefully long before.
• Grow a spine. You'll need it to handle the impending criticism!
• Make a list of people to print hard copies for. There's a few.
• Calculate the hole in your wallet that will be made by having said copies printed.
• Get your ass back on CritiqueCircle.com, start uploading the polished version, compile those critiques with the feedback from work people and friends, and post on the forums.
• Grab a grammar handbook, spend time at Borders studying, or grind grammar webpages.
• Create an account on Blogspot focused on my writing endeavors and nothing else.
• Compile music for the unofficial "soundtrack" to the novel. This is for fun. =)

At least I got the blog account setup (obviously), so that's one step closer to my goal. If anything, I am happy to have the groundwork laid, a virtual "Square 1" if you will. Someday I hope to look back on this date with fondness and remember what it was like to be unpublished. Perhaps it can encourage other would-be writers. Maybe it will help to keep me motivated. Truth be told, I don't know how well this will work out, but I'm telling myself to stay on it. There are many bloggers I admire, and perhaps someday I will become admirable myself. Time will tell.